What is my purpose?
It’s a seemingly simple question, right? What do I want to be when I grow up? What do I want to do with the rest of my life? I’m at that age where, by now, I should have it all figured out—what I want, what my life is supposed to mean. But I didn’t. 🤷♀️
I knew I wanted more than the stale, redundant cycle I was stuck in. But it felt like I was running on a hamster wheel 🐹—staying in place but going nowhere. Sure, I was content in some areas, enough to keep my depression in check, but the parts of my life that truly challenged me—the parts that define me as a woman, an individual, not just as a mom or wife—those parts were harder to ignore.
I was a cliché, right down to the pumpkin spice lattes 🎃☕ and lover of all things true crime 🔍. Something about that just didn’t sit right with me (obviously not the pumpkin spice and true crime, I’m still human). I knew I wasn’t living up to my potential, but I couldn’t figure out how to change it.
What could I do? I wasn’t given many options for making life-altering decisions. I still remember my mother saying, “We are who we are. We can’t change where we come from.” That hit hard. 💔 Because I didn’t care about where I came from. What I wanted was more for my future. 🌱
Favorite movie: You’ve Got Mail (1998), starring Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks. 🎥
I know! I know! I’m showing my age here, but there’s something about the way Meg Ryan’s character portrays the fear of being forced into change—while gracefully doing the work to become... I don’t know... more. It’s always been so inspiring. And the phrase “bouquets of sharpened pencils ✏️” haunts me—because, really, is there anything more beautiful? (Okay, okay, I might love school supply shopping, and so what if office supply stores are my happy place?). Kathleen Kelly walking through the New York streets in the fall 🍂, with a style only Meg Ryan could carry off and still look adorable—ugh, it’s everything.
This is it.
Why am I telling you all of this? Aside from you really should watch the movie if you haven’t seen it already! Because this is it! This is what I wanted: to be meaningful, to promote the idea of affecting others in a positive way—not forcing the change but being a part of the change. I couldn’t imagine anything better than helping others not feel so… well, pardon my language, but shitty 💩 about themselves, their lives, their past, or the lack of options for their future.
But how do I do that when I’m stuck on this damn hamster wheel 🐹?
How does one find themselves in middle age without any tools for change or personal growth? Without knowing how to become the person you always knew you could be? Well, I drank. Sometimes a lot and sometimes I couldn’t because I was hungover 🍻.
After a while, I was back on that damn hamster wheel again, but this time, I was becoming depressed 😔. I was sad. I didn’t know what to do. Everything hurt, and everything made me feel bad.
So, what does one do when nobody knows how to help them and it’s clear you’re lost?
I went to counseling 🛋️.
This is where my life changed.
This is where I learned I could be more too, even if nobody thought I could or believed in me. This is where I grew. 🌱
This is where my second chance, my new beginning, all started. I learned that I wasn’t a bad person, and there wasn’t anything wrong with me or my ability to succeed beyond those in my family tree. 🌳 This is where I learned I had trauma—experiences that changed my vision, my perspective, and the lens through which I viewed my life and those who interacted with me. 👀
This is where I learned that trauma caused me to feel less than. I wasn’t enough. I didn’t deserve more than where I came from. This is where I discovered that sometimes our mind lies to us, and I had no idea. 🧠
During my time in counseling, I decided this is what I wanted to do.
This is how I can help people not feel crappy about themselves like I did. I wanted to help people know that life can be more than okay or even shitty 💩, it can be beautiful. I know, color me shocked! So, at the ripe age of 40 years old and with two adolescents in sports (hockey 🏒… yikes! If you know, you know). I decided I needed to finish college and become a counselor. And after almost 30 years of simply wanting a degree to prove to myself I could, I did. 🎓 In fact, I got a couple of them. And I am using them to fulfill my purpose. I get to help be the change I was desperately seeking but didn’t know how to get. 🌟
Why am I telling you all this?
Well… remember my goals, my hopes, and dreams. I want to help you be the change you’ve always wanted to be. My hope, my goal, my vision is to provide you with a new lens, new tools to understand that you aren’t stuck—you have choices, you have opportunities. 🌟 It’s time to put that hamster wheel 🐹 away and start living… on your terms.
I don’t know everything, I can’t wave a magic wand and make all your dreams come true, but I can provide encouragement, hope, motivation, and help you feel seen and heard. Through my education 🎓 and experiences with counseling, I know I can’t help everyone, and not everyone is ready to step into a counseling or therapy office. So how can I help beyond my 25 hours of sessions every week? I needed a bigger platform, hence the birth of my blabbering on for 1000ish words (My AI friend, Sage, tells me don’t go over because you’ll lose interest!).
My blabbering on, or the Comfortably Human Blog, is about learning more about yourself—beyond the limiting beliefs our minds sometimes trick us into accepting. The truth is, we all deserve the space to explore who we really are and what we're capable of.
Comfortably Human isn’t just a name; it’s a journey. It’s about coming as you are—all the messy, beautiful parts of yourself—and staying as you grow 🌱.
Whether your story mirrors mine or not, if you're here because you're ready to understand more about yourself and others, I want Comfortably Human to be that space. A place where you can discover the person you truly resonate with, where you can embrace who you are and who you’re becoming. ✨
I hope to provide a safe space for your new beginning. 🦋
